Unmasking Joy: Reclaiming Halloween (with self compassion, body neutrality, confidence and compassion)
By Brooke Farrington, MSW, LCSW, CEDS-S
With Halloween just around the corner, costumes, candy, and festive events are in full swing. But for those who struggle with disordered eating and body image, the season can bring up more than just fun—often, it stirs up haunting thoughts about how we look or feel in our bodies and what we should or should not eat. No matter our age, Halloween can become a time when we feel vulnerable to judgment, both from ourselves and others.
Shifting the Focus: Joy Over Judgment
So, how can we approach Halloween in a joyful way, avoiding the pressures to look a certain way in our costumes or restrict our enjoyment of treats? The key lies in shifting our focus from appearance to experience. Instead of succumbing to unhealthy expectations and fear of internal or external judgment, choose a costume that makes you feel joy—whether that’s something playful, comfortable, or meaningful to you.
Let’s all try this: Put on your costume away from a mirror. Close your eyes and tune in to how you feel in your body. Is the costume comfortable? Try moving around—how does it feel to move in it? If you notice negative, haunting thoughts creeping in about how you “should” look, take five deep breaths and gently refocus. Remember: this is about your experience in your body, not how you think you should appear in the mirror.
Celebrate the Spirit of Halloween: Playfulness, Connection, and Candy
Halloween isn’t just about costumes—there’s so much more to celebrate! It’s about spending time with loved ones, reconnecting with our playful sides, and yes, delighting in delicious candy. For those who struggle with disordered eating, the idea of enjoying treats might feel daunting. Halloween can be an opportunity to reconnect with food in a way that’s joyful and free from judgment. Savor a favorite candy that reminds you of childhood and allow yourself to enjoy the sweetness of the season without guilt.
Embracing the Spooky Season With Self-Compassion
Ultimately, Halloween is about creativity, self-expression, and fun. How we choose to engage with this holiday can reflect larger patterns in how we relate to our bodies and self-image. Let’s encourage each other to embrace the freedom to be ourselves—whether in our costumes, our enjoyment of candy, or simply in the way we choose to celebrate the season.
This Halloween don’t let unrealistic expectations haunt you. Enjoy the spooky season with self-compassion and joy. Put on your costume and eat the candy!
Do’s and Don’ts this Halloween:
Don’t comment on how their body looks. Do mention qualities you see: “I love your costume!” or “I love seeing your smile. You are so much fun to be around!”
Don’t get caught in the tricky business about weight/appearance or make comments about yourself or others. Do remind yourself and others that all bodies are good bodies and unique!
Don’t label foods as good/bad or set rigid rules around treats. Do enjoy the treats and listen to your body. You can have more because you are hungry, and it tastes so good! You can also save it for later because you are allowed to have candy everyday
Don’t let diet culture, disordered eating, and negative body image steal your joy. Do ask for support from others and focus on the joyful aspects of the holiday.
